Disturbing News

I recently read an article in Reader’s Digest, titled Field of Screams, in Michael Crowley’s That’s Outrageous! column. Read the article — which is about the angry and sometimes even violent behavior displayed by parents at their kids’ sporting events — and you’ll see what’s so outrageous! This article touched me in a personal and individual way, and I wonder if it will do the same to you.

Temporary Solution

Putting fences up between parents on the sidelines and teams on the field, requiring parents to sign “codes of conduct,” enforcing serious punishments for parents, and banning the offenders from games are solutions that many sports organizations are implementing. These solutions are intended to keep kids safe and to salvage any benefits kids hoped to experience from participating in sports in the first place.

As Crowley stated in his article, “You can’t blame those Raleigh officials, but fencing off parents like they’re dangerous wild animals is no real remedy. The behavior itself has to stop”.

Yes, as we have all heard in the “Parenting on Track” class, if something your child is involved in is morally or physically dangerous — step in and take action. Will these actions solve the problem and cause the behavior to stop? No. To quote Vicki, “it’s a little like putting band-aids on bullet wounds. You’re just focusing on the symptom — the behavior will show up somewhere else, unless the problem is addressed.”

The Real Issue

Here is where experts suggest the problem lies:

Pollack points to more ‘intense’ parenting today. Everything from the scramble for precious athletic scholarships to our obsession with creating the perfect childhood is pushing moms and dads to new extremes. ‘It’s a highly pressurized environment and a sad commentary on our times,’ says Bruce Svare, a professor at the University at Albany who has studied the psychology of youth sports.”

One Person at a Time

Those of you on this site are most likely reading this because you know about “Parenting on Track” and Vicki’s interpretation of Adlerian psychology. You have the new information, and you are using it to change your lives and the lives of your families. You have prevented the problem in the first place — instead of allowing it to happen on your daughter’s softball field. You are the pioneers, so keep going. And what about other parents who are doing the best they can with the information they have? Keep walking the walk. Be a role model — society will shift, one person at a time.

The World Will Benefit

I invite you to not only read the article in Reader’s Digest, but to also re-read your notes from a “Parenting on Track” class — incorporate the new information, decide that you can make a difference, and persevere.

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